This Week in SCOHA - February 1st, 2020

Special Hangover Edition


SCOHA 2019/2020

So after a hectic week, January can get lost and we hope the door hits it on the way out. Let's recap last weeks action from down at the SCOHA Ice Palace...

JUNIOR DIVISION:

Redwings 2 Bruins 0: This Al Ringer fella can play goalie like it's no ones business. A glove hand that can slice tomatoes and he controls a rebound better than a dating website. Missing their top scorer Dino Laporta backyarda, the Wings were extra spicy, shutting out the B's 2-0. David Holmes on Homes scored the winner and added an assist for the winners. This game was very fast paced, more ups and downs than a toilet seat.

Oilers 3 Penguins 2: Mike Czepita skates like a deer. He was the star of the game scoring a pair of clappers as his Oilers slipped by the Penguins 3-2. Kevin Nagy scored both goals for the Pens but their ink ran dry and couldn't tie the game after a feverish last few minutes of the game. Tough loss but players felt good about their effort. Don Thompson assisted on both Oiler goals with some pinpoint passing and intestinal fortitude.

Flyers 6 Blackhawks 3: Hawks captain Ron Cybalski said after the game that his team is going to throw this one away with the bath water. The Flyers, led by a hatty from Doug Moulton, trounced the Hawks to the tune of 6-3. Flyers Mark Powell got a penalty for playing with a broken stick but he argued that he was just trying to make it more fair for the other team. Don't worry about the Hawks, these guys will be ready for the playoffs, just you wait.

INTERMEDIATE DIVISION:

Blackhawks 7 Flyers 2: The Hawks rubbed the Flyers nose into the carpet with a big 7-2 win. The Hotrum trio combined for a 9 point evening and both slept with their sticks after an impressive game. Brock had a hatty and Conrad dropped a filthy deuce for the winners. Flyers spent the night in the penalty box as their woes continued....

Penguins 1 Bruins 1: Paul Allain and Brian "Horizon" Powell were the only goal scorers, hope you picked the "under" in your Proline ticket, folks. A 1-1 tie but don't let the score fool ya, this game had more scoring chances than a north Hamilton rub and tug. Speaking of climaxing, the Bruins are playing some great hockey as we wind down the regular season. They are a force to be reckoned with...

Canadiens 1 Leafs 1: Was there cellophane wrapped around the nets? Another low scoring tie as the Leafs and Habs offered fans another playoff-like game. Mike Norman served 3 minor penalties and was first to get into the tray of sliced oranges back in the locker room. Bill Templeman got into the heads (bad pun) of the Leaf shooters while callup Etienne Venne was equal to the task in the Leaf crease. Jason Harvey and Dave Kat littered the nets for the only goals of the game.

MASTERS DIVISION:

Kings 9 Redwings 3: Mark Shadwell and Howie Micks scored 2 goals each as the Kings dropped the Wings like a hot radcap on a summers day. Micks mashed his way through the Wings defence several times, adding a pair of assists to his 2 goal performance. He took the game puck home for all to see. Let's pause and talk about Redwings Terry Gudgeon who scored a goal that made Bobby Orr's cup winning goal look like a preschoolers finger painting. Rocket doctors at NASA air control are determining the height Terry got during his goal celly.

Flames 6 Flyers 4: Come on Dave Armstrong, you could only get 4 goals? Pfffffff. He did everything but fill the water jugs and screw in that goalpost holder as his Flyers lost 6-4. Jason Anderson (no relation to Pamela unfortunately) scored 2 goals while Mike "killer bee" Vanderzee was buzzing around all night, recording 4 assists for the winners. Flyers Mike "jiffy" Lubrick ain't no slouch, he chipped in with 3 assists in a losing cause.

Bruins 5 Stars 2: Mike "12 string" Guitard had the amp turned up to 11 as he scored a hattrick to lead the B's to a hard fought 5-2 win over the Stars. Dale Brons scored both goals for the Stars who were not aligned on this night. Dale is currently vacationing in Cuba and was looking forward to the breakfast buffet for some beans and franks. Bruins Bob 'miss a" Tirnanic had 3 assists on the night. Bob is a non-aging Scoha hero amongst his peers. His attention to detail and tireless hours of video strategizing will never end.

Sharks 6 Blackhawks 1: Sharks Larry "Cable Guy" Litzgus ate up the opposition and cleaned the plate afterwards with a hat trick performance for the ages. Dave Cathcart wheeled in a pair of goals as the Sharks bit the Hawks 6-1. Stick tap to Sharks protector of the painted plumbing Brian Deanes with a great game in the net, turning away 37 shots for the W.

Well that puts a lid on another week of Scoha action. Lets thank the kid with the frozen feet who shovels the bit of snow at the zamboni entrance while we wait to hop on the ice. Without him.... well there would be a pile of snow at the zamboni entrance. Have a great Super Bowl Sunday or as someone up at the bar called it "Super Day Sunday"... we know what you meant haha

Chris Marttila


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