Well folks, here’s a fresh new SCOHA blog out of the oven. We will recap this past weekend’s action and give props to some of our SCOHA hockey heroes whether they deserve it or not.

United Division:

Flyers 2 Blackhawks 0: Half the Hawks were corking back some cordials at the Dizzy Donkey so they had to forfeit their scheduled game vs the Flyers. Just kidding, no idea what the hell they were doing but they had to forfeit. Game is recorded as a 2-0 victory. Who do we give the goals to? Bobby Clarke and Rick MacLeish, there you go. Shutout to Bernie Parent...

Bruins 9 Leafs 4: 7 different Bruins lit the lamp as the Bruins folded up the Leafs like a Penetanguishine street map 9-4 as fans celebrated Bob Tirnanic bobblehead night. A few threw theirs back onto the ice surface but still, it was a monumental evening. For the Leafs, Jake Alexander continues to impress scouts, recording a pair of filthy snipes and adding a pair of hamburger helpers with extra sauce on the side, thank you very much. Bruins Joe Shulist is a model of consistency out there. You know what you’re getting each and every night, hungover or not. We will try and get Joe on the Pucks in Deep Podcast in the next couple weeks.

Masters Division:

Leafs 3 Bruins 1: Bruins game sheet sticker looks like a damn football play with all the chicken scratch on it but who cares, they had enough to play the game. Thanks to those players that subbed in for the B’s and ended up playing 2 games that night, appreciated. I spoke to injured Bruins Richard Forster who is nursing a nine foot wide sprained ankle. Seemed to be walking around the bar pretty gingerly but if I could hazard a guess, I can see Richard back on his twirlers sooner than the doctors forecast of 4-6 weeks. Per TSN’s Darren Dreger, Richard has been working out in his basement and will be ready to tear it up upon his return to the lineup. For the Leafs, Marc Ayotte, Jeff Davis and Larry “ballroom” Litzgus scored while Terry Lee had the lobe Bruin goal. Keep this under your hat but Leafs “Crusader of the Corded Cottage” Sandro Marrone is back to his heroic puck stopping ways. This game should’ve been a definite Bruins win but Sandro made several 5-bell saves for the victory.

Sharks 4 Senators 1: The Sharks put forth a solid, defensive effort as they got past the 1st place Sens 4-1 in front of an announced crowd of 7. Andy Rossit led the way with a goal and an apple for the winners while that Chris Marttila guy had the lone Sens goal late in the game. “Le Legende” Dave Langille also scored for the Sharks as he leap-frogged Denis Savard on the all-time scoring list. This guy can play another 12 seasons if his knees allow him to. His pre-game meal consists of avacados and eggs but hey, if it’s worth the half hour sit down on the standard before each game, so be it.

Grand Masters Division:

Sharks 4 Flyers 3: Ronny “Millsap” Cooper scored the game winner with a shade over 7 minutes left as the Sharks swam by the Flyers 4-3.  The only thing Ron didn’t do this game is parallel park the team bus for crying out loud. Apparently he doesn’t like the loud reverse beeps. His teammates tossed him the game puck after the game but he missed it and it knocked over his beer. All was good, he got up and grabbed a new one. Dave Jarvis, my early pick for grand masters goal scoring champ this year, scored a pair and added a tuna helper for the winning side. For the Flyers, they got goals from Dennis Haradyn, Enzo Giammichele and Rob Nacha cheese, hold the jalapenos this time.

Bruins 1 Kraken 1: Al Angelone and Nick Polimeni, both from the 76’ FinCups scored as the Bruins and Kraken skated to a 1-1 tie in front of 1 fan. Thanks Terry for keeping the guys motivated out there. Bruins were missing Terry “hitman” Hughes which is why they couldn’t muster up the victory against the undefeated Kraken. Joe DeFaria and J.J. MacNeil both played solid games between the pipes. Let’s stop and mention Tim Manning. The Bruins veteran, according to published reports, captured 4 coyotes in Burlington with one hand on his stick. His off-season strength and conditioning coach had him juggling seedless watermelons blindfolded while scaling the Devil’s punch bowl. Now that’s training.

Stars 4 Blackhawks 3: Rob Harrison is a bonified sniper in this damn league and don’t forget it. Rob’s 2nd goal, according to reporters, was a short-handed effort as he fired it between Richard Paquet’s legs. At the other end, Barry Walker made 27 saves for the win and continued to raise eyebrows as an early candidate for the Vezina trophy. Mike Norman had an Ed Venema special (3 penalties and tossed from the game). Stars played the rest of the game with only 3 defencemen as Mike ate all the orange slices back in the locker room. For the Hawks, Serge Santinon, Tim Ritchie and Steph Rioux all scored some major-league snipes in a losing cause.

Premium Plus Tool Stars of the Week:

United Division: Joe Shulist

Masters Division: Andy Rossit

Grand Masters: Rob Harrison

Well that’s all from this end of the ice. Let’s get through the rest of this week and get back at it. See you on the weekend. I will be checking out some United action this Friday night, great group of guys, looking forward to it. Have a great rest of the week, fellas.

Chris Marttila

SCOHA Blog Guy

Well folks, this fella stayed up to watch that 18 inning marathon the other night and I was in the office the next day feeling more tired than a pair of dentures after a cold buffet but you know what, it was worth it. There were some even better games this past weekend, albeit men’s beer league but it’s our world series each and every weekend and no one can take that away from seasoned veterans like Mike Vanderzee and Al Angelone who are both approaching important milestones in their careers for games played by players with cement hands...

A few games over the weekend started to get a bit salty. You almost needed a moose to lick the salt off. All in all, you can tell the action is ramping up as we approach the end of October. United teams are starting to gel and the games are getting faster. Flyers team rep Mike Haslam was spotted applying Rub A5/35 the other week but claimed it is his new hockey cologne, knees are fine. Hattrick by Faberge, available at Shoppers, 8 bucks. Speaking of hat trick, this new Jordan Campbell kid in United is lighting the lamp multiple times every Friday, reminds me of Sean Riley when he played for the Lethbridge Bonnets back in 81. Campbell is an early favourite for Rookie of the Year. We will try and get him on the Pucks in Deep Podcast soon…

Last week’s games were a complete 180 degree turn-around from the previous week, lemme tell ya. United’s Walt Blagdon was skating around like he had motors on his skates. I don’t know what this guy has for a pre-game meal but I bet it’s rich in essential minerals. At any rate, let’s dip into the weekend that was…

Well folks... cold season is in full swing at this fellas house. Throat feels like i swallowed a wool sweater but there's deadlines to meet. Let's dive into last weeks action.

Elbow’s up, fellas, it’s the season premiere of this silly blog. This year, we welcome the Grand Masters Kraken as a team. What’s a Kraken? No, it’s not the view you get when the plumber is bent over trying to unclog the kitchen sink.

A Kraken is a legendary sea monster of enormous size, per its etymology something akin to a cephalopod, said to appear in the Norwegian Sea off the coast of Norway. Ya… just as I thought.