This Week in SCOHA – March 24th, 2020

Speaking of flattening the plank, Intermediate Flyers captain Dave Wichman took to social media this afternoon to scold his teammates for eating doughnuts. This non-essential snack seemed to get under Wichman’s skin as he tries to keep his club ready for the continuation of the Scoha playoffs, if there is one. Apparently the States will be 100% up and running by Easter weekend so the world will be perfect again. Speaking of perfect again, our cub reporter Guy Shaver, who has been camped out at the arena since this whole Corona thing started, has asked to go home. I just left the rink and Guy just finished packing up his Coleman stove and is heading home. He said he was looking forward to drawing a bath then relaxing for a few days. He said a bat scared him last night. He stood on his folding chair and tried to shoo it away with his 6ft. hockey stick he used for social distancing. We thank Guy for braving the elements on behalf of the league. One hell of a Guy.

At any rate, SCOHA is still tucked away until further notice. Masters Sharks goalie Brian Deanes is keeping his eye/hand coordination in check by catching flies with a pair of chopsticks. I am literally holding a paper towel on my ear to stop the bleeding as I got too close with my razor while I type with my right hand.

As you know, the tournament is canceled. Rumour has it, one of the U.S. teams were stacked with ex-nhl-ers like Pat LaFontaine, Mike Modano, Brett Hull and goaltender Mike Richter so no other team stood a chance anyway, so there!

Well this update is short and sweet, to the point. Have a great rest of the week, gang…

Chris Marttila