This Week in SCOHA – October 18th, 2022
The Season is in Full Swing Edition
I haven’t run any data or crunched any numbers, but I feel super confident in declaring October to be the top month for use of the word “Spooktacular”. This past weekend was pretty damn spooktacular as far as goal scoring goes. Hey did anyone see Paul Cleary’s goal Sunday night? Upstairs where grandpa keeps the flashlight. Great to see this guy back in the lineup and a great guy in the damn locker room, I can attest. More jabs than Muhammed Ali and Sonny Liston…
UNITED DIVISION:
Fans are turning up in droves for this new division, whatever a drove is. The concession stand ran out of popcorn there were so many fans in the crowd for all games. Great to see league revenue is through the moon and hey folks, there are a few seats available for this upcoming weekends games, bring the kids.
FRI.OCT.7
BRUINS 5 FLYERS 5: More back and forth’s that a ping-pong game or a table tennis game, same thing let’s be honest. Bruins Jeff Nolet scored a hatty while Walt Blagdon lit the lamp twice for the Flyers who’s lineup was leaner than an Arby’s sandwich before league exec Yves Bisson (aka Christmas Yves) filled their roster for them. Spare Dino Laporta backyarda also scored twice for the men in orange. Crazy game, was sorry I missed it. Had the under on my Proline ticket.
SHARKS 1 BLACKHAWKS 0: Bit of a shocker here, not gonna lie. The hawks have more power than 28 Duracell lantern batteries but can’t seem to be getting the goals they need to win. Sharks Jay Barry scored the lone goal in this hockey game to propel the teal guys to victory. Sharks called up Ed “Shaky” Walton from the minors for this one and after showing a bit of rust, calmed down and played a decent game. We hope to sit down with Walton soon for a candid interview. This guy has some dirt on some old SCOHA antics from days past that we would all pull up a chair to listen to.
OILERS 5 CANADIENS 4: let’s pause for a minute and talk about Oilers defenceman Ken Hutchinson. The guy has a reach of a Don-Ellis skyscraper. His 6’9” frame maneuvers around the ice surface smoother than a Bristol Cove snow owl in Newfounland. At any rate, my point is I am glad he is on my team so I don’t have to try and get the puck around this tall glass of water all night. The Dewalt performer of the game for this one went to Oilers Justin Whitwell who scored 4 as the Oil slid past the Habs 5-4. Goals seem to come easy for Whitwell, been that way since the ripe ol’ age of 8.
Good to see Bill “aluminum” Foley get on the scoresheet for Les habitants. Same for Bill “Holiday” Innes who checked in on time and tucked home a nice one, no room service required.
SUN.OCT.16
OILERS 5 BLACKHAWKS 2: The Blackhawks lineup is terrifying on paper, folks. When their top player Marc “Late Night Drive-thru at Taco” Bellhuemer misses the game after his significant other dragged him to the Kitchen & Bath Event down at the Rona, his team suffers dearly. Hope the chrome tap set was well worth it as your Hawks dropped a 5-2 decision to the surging Oilers. Duane “from the faraway planet of” Marzi lit up the sky with 2 impressive goals while as I mentioned earlier, Paul “I can see” Cleary also replied for the winners. A handful of spares suited up for the Hawks but they were unable to score more than two on Tim Visser, a prominent force in the Oilers crease. Chris “great” Scott and Paul “quick draw” McGraw tallied for the Hawks.
BRUINS 4 CANADIENS 4: I actually picked a tie in my SCOHA pick’em pool on this one. Bruins’ rookie Chris Conroy started his SCOHA career on the right foot with a 3-point night as the Bruins and Habs both went home happy with a single point. Mike Leblanc scored a pair for the Canadiens as the boisterous crowd at the Bell Centre stood for most of the game chanting that silly song they sing. Bruins veteran Richard Forster spoke to a handful of reporters after the game and said his team capitalized on pucks in deep, pressuring the Canadiens defense all night long. He added that his team was given a day off Monday and will resume practice on Tuesday.
FLYERS 6 SHARKS 3: Thanks to Masters Billy Kircos for filling in on the organ for this game after the arena dj fell ill. Ryan Haslam made the Sharks shed an unusual amount of tears after this game as he put up a 4-spot en route to a 6-3 win over the Sharks. The pending free agent mentioned after the game his contract talks have stalled as he wants concentrate on a healthy and productive season before sitting down with his family to discuss his future with the Flyers. I heard from a credible source that an 8 year deal was put on the table in and around the 64 mil area but I am not a SCOHA Insider, I will leave it up to those guys to confirm it.
MASTERS DIVISION:
FRI.OCT.14
FLYERS 7 BRUINS 7: This game was bananas from the start. It was the Armstrong vs Horner Show as the two combined for 7 goals and 2 assists for their respective clubs. Flyers were up 7-2 before the team bus went over the damn cliff resulting in a 7-7 final. Both goaltenders soaked in separate ice baths after this one. Fans are still talking about this crazy game as one of the classic SCOHA games ever played, edging out the Northstars and Rockies game from March of 74’.
Dave Armstrong could light up the Swedish Elite League with an alan key as a stick. He scored 4 and set up another while Bruins Steve Horner scored 3 and added an assist. Rumour has it Horner has upset a lot of fans of the Japanese Tier 1 League when he opted out of his 7 year deal to join the Bruins. We will wait to have a chat with Steve to get some kind of confirmation. If anyone has the game tape of this wild and wooly affair, please forward it so we can add it to the SCOHA capsule.
BLACKHAWKS 3 REDWINGS 1: Blackhawks are getting a ton of fan mail addressed to Larry Litzgus. This guy brings it every single game, kind of like Heinz brings his glob to a grill cheese when we get home from the rink. 2 more goals for the Larrinator as the Hawks beat the Redwings 3-1. What in the name of Pat Benetar did Ron Hall have for a pre-game meal, anyway. The Hawk forward set up two goals, including the eventual game winner. He tossed his stick into the crowd when he was named first star of the game so we will see how well he plays this weekend. Redwings got a snipe from Grant “don’t call me Roch” Voisin in a losing cause. Great game, fellas!
SUN.OCT.16
BLACKHAWKS 5 FLYERS 4: Tough weekend for the guys in orange. After they surrendered a big lead Friday night, they travelled overnight for another game a few nights later in Chicago against a pesky Hawk team looking to make a name for themselves in this league. Diamond Dave Langille scored the game winner as the Hawks won 5-4. Larry Litzgus scored another three goals, what else is new. How many orange Fanta’s does this guy chug before the game, good grief. “That Hawk team doesn’t let the cement harden, they are constantly skating hard and age is definitely not against them”, said a bewildered Guy Shaver in the Flyers room. Nick Miscione scored a pair in a losing cause and added a helper to help show team brass he is digging in deep each and every game. Anyone catch a glimpse of Hawks Lee Paule’s goal, How on earth did he get that to go in? Someone have an answer on my desk by 8am tomorrow. A couple unsportsmanlike conducts were called on the Flyers as they let their weekend play get to their heads a bit. Lemme tell you something, gang, this Flyer squad is far from giving up and they will be there in the end. Season is just getting started so tell their fans to calm down already.
FLAMES 3 BRUINS 1: This Flames team has air-tight defense that don’t allow a shot on goal unless they really have to. Dave Graham crusaded through half the Bruins team to score the game winner as the Flames extinguished the B’s 3-1. Stick tap to Scott Johnson for playing 2 games on this night, the guys appreciate it fella. Tymen Edelkoort plays goalie like the puck is the size of a toilet seat. He made 25 saves for the win and was sour he let one in, that’s the confidence level Tymen is playing at right now.
STARS 7 REDWINGS 2: Redwings Ed Walton did everything for his team but disinfect the team bus as they lost 7-2 to a motivated Stars club. Ed had two major league snipes and was named second star of the game despite the loss. Redwings Eric Sippel was documented to have received a two-minute minor for sliding so if someone can fill me in on this one, that would be swell. Maybe he left his skate guards on and went out for his first shift, I have no clue. At any rate, Alfonso Tinebra and Jason Anderson both scored a pair for the Stars. Chris Barratto went on and on like a soup and a sandwich about how well his team is playing and how he appreciates the unbridled enthusiasm his guys bring to the rink all the damn time.
PENGUINS 4 SHARKS 2: Penguins Steve Kivell wasn’t actually lazing on a beach for this one as he scored a pair to lift the Pens to a 4-1 win over the Sharks. Pens Domenic Chiarini also fell victim to the mysterious sliding penalty, I will confirm this when I hear but a voice in my right earpiece is now telling me it should say slashing so there’s that. Pens goalie Brian Deanes kicked aside 41 shots for the win, moving him up to 8th all-time in goalie victories, 6 behind Jim Rutherford and 12 behind Tony Esposito for 6th. The Sharks were confident going into this one but felt like they stepped on a rake when all was said and done. GM Ron Cooper was threatening line changes for this week but we will see.
Well, that wraps up a lengthy recap of the past weekend’s games. It’s a long season, folks, we are just getting settled in. Was great to see more players up at the bar after sharing some laughs and jabs toward each other over a cold one. Another positive note, I haven’t seen a mosquito in about a month! Have a great rest of the week, see you all in a few weeks, I am away this weekend but will try and get the game sheets early next week.
I would be remiss if I didn’t extend condolences to our president and leader, Terry Gudgeon and his family for the loss of his mother. On behalf of your whole SCOHA family, we have you in our thoughts during this difficult time.
Chris Marttila
SCOHA Blogologist