This Week in SCOHA - March 29th, 2022

The Slap in The Face Edition

This past weekend of SCOHA action was crazier than a Hong Kong bbq! No time to thank our sponsors this week, let’s get right to the action….

JUNIOR DIVISION: PLAYOFFS

FLYERS 4 BRUINS 0: Programming note: The Flyers are brimming with confidence after their latest win, a 4-0 drain-circling win over the big bad Bruins. Newcomer Jason Pryde scored the eventual game winner as his traditional chick pea pasta dinner seems to be working each and every week. Jason was a guest on the Morning Brew Podcast this week and he was bosting about the Flyers resurgence since he came aboard. Hey folks, have you seen the new Flyers goalie Lino Cosco play yet? Any true SCOHA fan would jump on plains, trains and automobiles to see this guy stop the puck all damn night. He is kicking ass and chewing gum and he is all out of gum. Bruins realize they have to stay out of the penalty box to secure some wins. Three crucial calls against them sealed the deal on this night.

OILERS 8 REDWINGS 3: Redwings Shaun Tompkins said after this lopsided loss that this one was on a scale of 1 to devastating. A lot of hustle and no flow was how one reporter called it afterwards. Oilers took it to the Wings 8-3. Let’s cut to the Chevy Chase here fellas, defense wins championships. The Redwings held a closed-door meeting after the game to go over some film and air out their grievances. Here’s hoping they can rebound this upcoming weekend. Oilers Steve Ditta’s knee felt like LuLu from Hee-Haw jumped on it but he still played. When the final buzzer sounded, Steve tallied 3 goals and 3 assists. I would say he did everything but sing the damn anthem but someone heard him whistling it to himself during warmup. Oilers Chris Baliva (or not) scored a goal for the ages. The rewind button on my vcr broke from watching this one over and over again….

INTERMEDIATE DIVISION: LAST REGULAR SEASON GAMES:

BLACKHAWKS 3 BRUINS 2: The Chicago Stadium was pretty loud as the host Blackhawks came from behind and edged the Bruins 3-2. Shawn James scored the game winner with about a minute left to secure the win. Bruin’s Richard Forster and mike LeBlanc tallied for the B’s who played well but fell just a bit short. Both goalies made several Grant Fuhr-like saves fore their respective hockey clubs.

FLYERS 7 CANADIENS 5: What happened here? That’s a good question, thank you for taking interest, Kyle. The answer is the floodgates opened. Both teams left it all out on the ice, gave 100% and did it all for the fans who came out. Flyers Brock “hot wheels” Hotrum scored a hatty, while 41 players had a pair of points each in this slugfest. The Habs were down 6 guys, hopefully they can get the right schedule out to their players before this week’s playoffs start. When Bill Foley is out of the lineup, it is noticeable. Foley can wrap up opposing defencemen like a ham and cheese lettuce wrap with his eyes closed. His contract is up at the end of this season. As the old commercial went, “what’s in your wallet?” he will be seeking a substantial pay raise especially after this year’s numbers.

MASTERS DIVISION: PLAYOFFS

STARS 5 FLAMES 2: Stars’ Alistair Kermack showed up to the rink with a one litre bottle of Jolt Cola under his arm. He played with a purpose, scored the game winner, and went home with the game puck after a big 5-2 win over the Flames.

Also scoring for the Stars were Mike “12-string acoustic” Guitard, Rob Harrison and Danny “double d” DiGiacinto. The Stars were missing team captain and GM Chris Barratto who decided to catch the season finale of the Spring Baking Championship over on the Food Network.

BLACKHAWKS 2 REDWINGS 1: Someone finally put a stick in the wheel of the Redwings. These guys have been hotter than an onion bun for the past month but the Hawks put a pause on that. Mike Haslam scored both goals for the Hawks as he continues to tear up the league. New rule: Mike has to use the other end of his hockey stick, who’s all in favour? Good grief. This was a defensive battle from start to finish but the fans enjoyed every minute. Didn’t help that there were $4 drafts for this one.

SHARKS 5 KINGS 2: Shark’s wiley veteran Al Angelone makes his own damn pasta, none of that Italpasta stuff. Oh it shows. Angelone sniped the game winning goal as his Sharks fed on the Kings 5-2 and threw extra parmesan on top for good measure. Mike Archer had the arrow pointed in the right direction, scoring a goal and adding a few helpers for the winners. King’s superstar Dave Langille (I have his rookie card) scored your typical Langille goal, hard working sequence followed by a shot upstairs where Aunt Bethany keeps the Polident. The Kings were called for too many men twice in this one. Might be a SCOHA playoff record… Apparently, they were trying to get a leg up on the other team, who knows…

BRUINS 3 FLYERS 3: We don’t give the Flyers enough credit, folks. Richard “salt and pepper” Paquet has been playing well in the net. Rookie sensation Bernard “beef” Bouliane brings the passion each and every game while Dale Brons seems to be finding his scoring touch once again. Team captain Pat “storm” Sergi scored the Flyers first goal of the night on a nifty tic-tac-toe play that brought the lone fan to their feet. Actually one foot, he was in a cast and crutches.

Bruins nominee for most sportsmanlike player this year, Al Oddie, scored a pair for the B’s. We are hearing the Flyers put glue on the bottom of Dave Armstrong’s skates to slow him down. He failed to register a point for the first time since April of ’71.

Well that puts a bow on last weekend’s action. If anyone caught the Junior Division games Friday night, you would agree that they were pretty high-paced games. All three divisions are now in playoff-mode as of this week. Tickets and merchandise are selling out pretty quick so call ahead to avoid disappointment. Don’t forget to hop on our website and register for next year’s season which guarantees to be the best yet! Enjoy the rest of the week, see y’all this weekend!

Chris Marttila

SCOHA E-Columnist . Podcast host

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